segunda-feira, janeiro 03, 2005

Maldizpost - My Blog

(My Band)
(Intro)
I don't know, dude ...
I think everyone's all jealous and shit cause I'm like,
the writer of a Stand-up Comedy blog, dude...
And I think everyone's got a fuckin' problem with me dude
Just because I’m acquainted with most of them...
And they have to put up with me after the show
Because I really admire and respect their job, their work, their art
And I feel like telling them the way I feel
‘Cause I ain’t no groupie and when I say I feel something
You may be positive that it is for real
(Chorus)
These people don't even know the name of my blog
But they're all licking themselves like dogs
Cause once I write they know that I'll be the woman
All because I'm the only writer of my blog
My blog (repeated 8x)
So I start off typing and drop the pen
Walk up to the shows and I'm all like
What's up?! My name is Inês Ramos
And I really admire your work, friend
They're all like nice and take pics. with me
Kelly, oh, my fuckin' God, it's her again
I swear to fuckin' God, that bitch sets me an outrage
I’m so jealous! I should be the one going to the backstage!
And by now the rest of the girls get so uptight
When I start talking with comedians and they tell me I’m bright
All the chicks start yellin', all the hot babes in pink
What are they? Some kind of cult? No stupid, they are people who think!
So like them every single night I like to think too
And when I think I like to publish my thoughts for all of you
'Cause they're back on stage the next night and I’ll be
There, supporting them and they like to hear from me
Yesterday I was chatting with this girl from #Levanta-te e Ri
Because I told her I befriended with MH
This groupie shit, gets me sick, and gave me an headache
And almost all the other girls just despise me because
(Chorus)
These chicks don't even know the name of the guys
But they're all on them like they wanna get wise
Or maybe get to know them and their personal lives
Do they actually know most of them have kids and wives?
My blog (repeated 8x)
(Verse 2)
You just wanna hold hands and hear their jokes, don't you?
Hey, why don’t you groupies ask them out on a date?
Dreaming of a private performance and breakfast in bed?
But that’s the kind of thing I guess that makes them sad
Askin’ for their autograph, I guess It’s ok…
And no, I don’t think it’s wrong to sing “Mr. Gay”
What the hell is wrong with me going to the dressing room?
‘Cause I look like crap and I’m not all prissy-tied up like you sodding bitches?
See I know what it is all about, it's simple but it makes you itches
All I did was read as many books as I could
So I have more knowledge? I’m not trynna get on the map
Doin' fake acts while get whipped on my back
(Verse 3)
Look at her, lil’ prissy blonde cunt thinkin' she’s all that
Yeah, I know, man, find herself tapping comedians on the back
Hey, she’s pathetic calling their attention with a mini-skirt
(All those chicks are lil’ piggies diggin’ on the same dirt)
You gonna be late for the rehearsal
Bitch, I ain't goin' to the rehearsal…Are you crazy?
Rehearsal is only for the stage director!
You know what, looks like one of those cunts wants to say somethin'
Hey, yo, Inês
(A Eu: You got somethin' to say?!)
Sorry, no
I thought you 'bout to tell her off, Vanda, what's up
Bitch, I'ma tell her when I feel like it, Marlene, shut up
And you ain't even back me up when we s'posed to be girlfriends
When I was 'bout to talk right after you
I swear, I swear girl
(Chorus)
These chicks don't even know the name of my blog
But they're all on Him like they wanna hold hands
'Cuz once the show starts they know that He is The Man
All because he is the lead singer with no band!
(Verse 4)
They say some comedians rock, but most of them do not
Once they sold out arenas to the amusement park
I'm gonna let the world know that Stand Up Comedy is hot
No one should say a peep when the show starts
No hecklers, not even a fucking dumbass fan
Every time I'hear Hey Miss, I love your blog
This is just a blog, bitch, give me a little break
It’s not a bloody fan-site ‘cuz that’s phony and fake
And these girls they can find every official site these guys have
(A Eu: Let me just stop here for a lil’ fag…)
Bitch, I’m getting sick and tired of this rap…
Can't make it to the stage, security in your way
Who the fuck are you? Where's your backstage pass?!
(Verse 5)
God dammit, I'm sick of this groupie shit
Time to go solo and make some loot
I told you I made the blog and wrote all the texts
Even translated stuff from Bill Hicks
Listenning to Ena Pá 2000, Cebola Mol and other freaks…
Like Catita Brothers, Ultraje a Rigor, and other funny geeks…
From programs like Flash, I got some suggestions
Fuck true admirers, lets ask cute groupies the questions
Like who are they? How this comedy thing started?
What about Pedro Tochas?
Bitch, are you retarded?
Anyway, Like he always says “I'm the King of Stand Up Comedy
Fat bigass stomach, bitches think I'm cute…
Then Rui Unas told me to do sit-ups to get buff
I did two and a half and then I couldn't get up!
Fuck Sit-Ups, I'm outta this shit
I'm gonna do Stand Up Comedy and drink Frize to get fit!
(A Eu)
Bitch why can't you see you're one stupid cunt
And it just tears my ass apart to know that you are so damn’ blunt
(Chorus)
These chicks don't even know the name of the guys (Ha, ha)
But they're all on them like they wanna get wise (Fuck ‘em!)
Or maybe get to know them and their personal lives
Do they actually know most of them have kids and wives?
My blog (repeated 9x)
(Outro)
The hottest comedy blog in the world ...
(A Eu)
I'm the only writer of my blog, I write all the texts of my blog
I'm the author and the mentor of my blog, my blogspot
Makes all the clever people wanna laugh
My blogspot, look out for my next blog, it's called My Blog
My blog, blog, blog, blog, my blog
Makes all the intelligent people want to smile
And laugh their socks off
My blog makes all smart masses want to laugh
And laugh their socks off, my blog
(Where'd everybody go?)

11 Comments:

Blogger Sergy disse...

Não vou adjectivar este post, pois não há mesmo palavras, e tu já sabes o que eu penso disto!
Por essas e por outras é que eu digo que tu tens muito valor! Beijos!

3:42 da tarde  
Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hmmmm, isso tudo e 'tavas maldizpozta... imagino se 'tivesses bem dizpozta :)

6:56 da tarde  
Blogger Dr. Hee disse...

Este comentário foi removido por um administrador do blogue.

7:40 da tarde  
Blogger Goth Mortens disse...

Dizer que está muito bom seria fazer chover no molhado.

8:35 da tarde  
Blogger Sergy disse...

Normalmente quando se alteram as letras indica-se às pessoas qual é a música original a ser parodiada, óh kiducha!:)

7:46 da tarde  
Blogger Inês Ramos disse...

Tinha-me esquecido. Sorry lá! ;)

8:02 da tarde  
Blogger Sergy disse...

Totó!!!:)

8:04 da tarde  
Blogger Sergy disse...

Duas perguntas:
Quem é a Vanda?
Quem é a Marlene?

2:10 da tarde  
Blogger Inês Ramos disse...

São protótipos das pitas de 14/15 anos que também são "stand up comedy groupies"... Yukkkk!!!

3:43 da tarde  
Blogger Sergy disse...

São nomes bem slutty, tb!:)

3:59 da tarde  
Blogger Inês Ramos disse...

Pois são, foram escolhidos "a dedo"!

4:15 da tarde  

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