The Muppets on Shakespeare

The Muppets on Shakespeare

Veterinarian's Hospital - Hamlet

(Scene: it is the episode of The Muppet Show with Rudolf Nureyev, and Sam the Eagle has convinced Kermit that all the sketches need to be cultural; a small pig is on the operating table.)

And now, Veterinarian's Hospital. In this special episode our quack who has gone to the dogs will pay tribute to William Shakespeare.

DR. BOB: Prithee Nurse, who beeth our next patient?

NURSE JANICE: Why this little piglet, sire.

DR. BOB: Not piglet, Hamlet! Remember, we're doing Shakespeare here.

NURSE JANICE: Hmmm...sounds more like Bacon!

DR. BOB: Say this patient needs a transfusion. What's his blood type?

NURSE JANICE: Well, I think it's 2B, but I'm not sure.

DR. BOB: Well, make up your mind. 2B or not 2B?

NURSE PIGGY: These people have no shame.

DR. BOB: Say...I'm listening to this patient's heart. Zounds.

NURSE PIGGY: Zounds what?

DR. BOB: Zounds terrible! Yeah, the frog wanted Shakespeare, he's gettin' Shakespeare.

NURSE JANICE: But you're a doctor first!

DR. BOB: Right. Doctor first, Richard the Second, Henry the Fourth.

NURSE PIGGY: Methinks we should take our leave.

DR. BOB: Why?

NURSE PIGGY: Look at the time.

DR. BOB: Say, it's the timing of the shrew.

NURSE PIGGY: Are you calling me a shrew?

DR. BOB: If the shrew fits...! So we leave Veterinarian's Hospital on their own.

Tune in next week when we'll hear Dr. Bob say:

DR. BOB: Alas, poor por-rk. I knew thee well!

STATLER: You know, that really offended me. I'm a student of Shakespeare!

WALDORF: Huh. You were a student *with* Shakespeare.

By: Jim Henson